Inuyasha One Half
by The Big Pen
Summary: AU. Inuyasha is a regular kid on a class field trip to China. By some twist of fate, he falls into an enchanted spring in Jusenkyo, which turns him into a girl! Full summary inside.
1. Chapter One

Story: Inuyasha One Half  
  
Author: Minuiko  
  
Summary: AU. Inuyasha is a regular kid on a class field trip to China. By some twist of fate, he falls into an enchanted spring in Jusenkyo, which turns him into a girl! While he searches for a cure, he makes new friends, enemies, and learns to deal with becoming the opposite gender. Inuyasha/Kagome, Miroku/Sango, etc.  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Inuyasha's POV  
  
"What do you want from me, Inuyasha?"  
  
Did he always have to sound so flat? I let go of my pride and pleaded, "C'mon, Sesshoumaru! I really need to go on the field trip, but I need a chaperone, and—"  
  
He rattled off in his usual bored voice, "Mom and Dad are dead, I'm on my break, and therefore I have to go and baby-sit you?"  
  
I snapped, "If you knew, then why don't you answer?"  
  
He gave a tight smile. I swear, I have never seen this jerk smile before—not a real smile. Of course, I had to beg extra pitifully for him to agree on "babysitting" me (as he put it). He said, "Tell me why you 'need' to go, and I might consent."  
  
Damn. I thought, /He's gonna tease me again/. I glared at him. "No reason. It would save me from competing in glaring contests with teachers, and—"  
  
He interrupted, smirking, "You get to be with your girlfriend."  
  
I growled, "Bastard. Kagome's NOT my girlfr—"  
  
He waved his hand in dismissal. "I knew what you were going to say. Very well, I'll go."  
  
Now, this was one of my friendliest (and shortest) talks with my god- damned older half-brother Sesshoumaru. We didn't really get along (probably because our father ditched his mom for my mom), but he was my "legal guardian." So I had to put up with it. At least we never went further than a few scratches.  
  
I walked out, put my fist in the air, and said, "Score!"  
  
Before I had time to celebrate, Sesshoumaru was outside, a mean smile playing on his face. "Oh, and unless you want to wear your old clothes to the field trip you need to go on so badly, I suggest you do the laundry. Or does your girlfriend like you smelling like old gym socks?"  
  
I cursed. He knew that I hated laundry work. I muttered sarcastically, "Whatever, Sesshoumaru-sama."  
  
He bared his teeth in a grin, replying smugly, "Go."  
  
Before I was out of earshot, I yelled back, "She's NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!!!"  
  
Jusenkyo  
  
Inuyasha's POV  
  
We were at Jusenkyo! Finally. The town was bustling, but it was rather primitive. And it was a bit too nature-related. I sniffed, "Doesn't look like much."  
  
Sesshoumaru, who was wearing a tie and collared shirt (I hated it when he tried to look sophisticated; his so-called birthmarks and eye- shadow made him look like a total geek) was standing casually beside me. He yawned. "Your girlfriend's not here yet, little brother."  
  
I clenched my hands into a fist. "Are you deaf? Every day I have to tell you the same things over and over again: She's not my girlfriend!"  
  
He shook his head very noticeably, and I tried to punch him. Key word: Tried. He was a whole lot better than me at everything, even fighting, so he easily blocked my blow and caught me in a headlock.  
  
"Hey, Inuyasha!"  
  
I looked up at the familiar voice, struggling not to blush. She HAD to come right when Sesshoumaru was in the middle of humiliating me. Really great timing, Kagome.  
  
Sesshoumaru smirked, letting me go. He whispered insinuatingly, "I won't keep you two apart for long," and departed gracefully, as though nothing happened. The bastard.  
  
Kagome Higurashi waved to me. She was my best friend, but she was sometimes so optimistic that I wanted to puke. I muttered, "Hey, Kagome."  
  
She smiled, saying brightly, "Was that your brother? You two kinda look alike."  
  
I sputtered. How the hell did I look like him?! For one, I didn't wear cosmetics. I had black hair and brown eyes, not silver and gold. She waved her hands around, explaining, "Your face structures, the way you both keep your hair long, your movements."  
  
Yeah, right, our movements. The way he nearly choked me to death and the way I lay squirming. We were nothing alike. Kagome changed the subject. "Hey, you wanna go visit the fighting grounds?"  
  
I brightened. I really did like fighting, no matter how many times my damned brother always beat me at it. Kagome knew that. We went.  
  
It turned out that the Jusenkyo fighting grounds consisted of hundreds of ancient poles stemming out of separate springs. Good luck not falling in, whoever fought there. Kagome asked me, "So, what's your brother like?"  
  
I snorted. "Honestly? He's a real bastard."  
  
She laughed. "No, really. I'm sure that deep down, you really care about each other."  
  
Yeah, when hell freezes over. The care she was talking about, it must be buried really, really deep down. Like maybe two thousand leagues down. I sighed. "Okay. He teases me a lot. He makes me do laundry, wash the dishes, all the junk work. Alright? His personality . . . let's just say: a rock has more emotions than he does. Although . . ." I thought about it. "These days, he has been showing a heck of a lot more emotion than before . . ."  
  
She smiled. "What about his appearance?"  
  
I grinned. This would be fun. "Okay. His hair is naturally silver, don't ask me who he gets his genes from. Those stripes on his cheek are supposedly birthmarks, and he wears eye-shadow—"  
  
A flat voice sounded from behind me. "Inuyasha."  
  
Yaah! Sesshoumaru! I panicked, and accidentally fell headfirst into a random spring. They were pretty shallow, but . . . I looked down. Was I skinnier? I sure felt less buff. What was happening?  
  
I resurfaced, gasping. No! My chest was . . . okay, immaturely put, they were girly. Not exactly melons. Around Kagome's size (Hey! No guy could really resist looking! Only . . . I wasn't a guy anymore).  
  
Sesshoumaru stared down apprehensively at me. "I was about to warn you that the springs here were cursed. Looks like you found out first- hand."  
  
I screeched, "No shit, Sherlock! I'm – I'm a GIRL, ASSHOLE!!!"  
  
He smirked. "As I can see. So. What were you saying about my eye- shadow . . . little sister?"  
  
Huh? What was that for? I muttered, "Shaddup," then turned to Kagome, baffled. She slowly reached into her pocket, and handed me a round mirror. She said, still shocked, "Don't freak."  
  
I didn't, not on the outside anyways. On the inside, of course. I looked so . . . so girly! A girl with eye-shadow. Dark sakura, Sesshoumaru- colored eye-shadow. Damn. Guess I can't tease him anymore. I glared at my oh-so-useful older brother. "Don't say anything."  
  
Kagome seemed to have gotten over her initial shock. She just stood there laughing, and laughing, and laughing. I sniffed, about to go, when she stopped laughing long enough to grab hold of me.  
  
"Wait – Inuyasha. I don't think you'll want to wear that."  
  
She pointed to my boys' shirt, which had gotten soaked, skintight, and overlarge. Not that I was fat or anything, but I preferred baggy clothing. I looked, filled with dread. I stifled a look of horror: my chest was pointing out. I never noticed it on Kagome.  
  
She smiled slightly, saying brightly, "I have a spare uniform you can wear. And some, er, accessories."  
  
Sesshoumaru, behind me, looked like he wanted to say something, but wanted to keep it to himself at the same time. At the conclusion of the brief struggle etched on his face, a smirk grew. He waved his hand and strolled away, saying with almost no feeling, "I'll see you around."  
  
Before I couldn't hear, he added, "Sister." I rudely gestured at his back, but he didn't notice. Kagome, smiling, pulled me into her room at the Jusenkyo hotel.  
  
Camp Grounds  
  
Miroku's POV  
  
I was accompanying Lady Sango on the one week educational field trip to Jusenkyo, China. Truthfully, she was watching me, not the other way around, but I was older, so it seemed logical that I would be the chaperone.  
  
As Sango was distracted by her other friends, I spied Lady Kagome, Sango's best friend, with a girl I didn't recognize. The new girl was very attractive, and assuming she didn't know me, I strolled over to her.  
  
She looked so defenseless, so utterly confused and gloomy. Whistling innocently, I pretended to trip and rubbed against her butt. On purpose, of course. She tensed up. "Miroku, you PERVERT!!!"  
  
Before I knew it, I was on the ground, a handprint clearly visible on my cheek. I had to admit, it HURT. Even more than Sango's. Which was saying a lot. I got up groggily. So. She did know who I was. So why didn't I know her?  
  
Kagome, obviously, noticed. She smiled at me, teasing, "Looks like you got rejected again, lech."  
  
I groaned, rubbing my cheek. Kagome grew serious. "The springs around here are cursed. This," she motioned to the flushing girl besides her, "is Inuyasha."  
  
My eyes widened. Inuyasha snorted, looking contemptuously at me. "Don't you dare laugh, Miroku."  
  
Whoops. I had already started laughing. Manic laughter. The people around me started edging away from me, like I was a disease or something. Oh well, I couldn't blame them.  
  
Kagome waited for me to recover. "You can tell Sango, but no one else is allowed to know, got it?"  
  
I smiled at Inuyasha. "Nice skirt, Inu. It looks like we have more in common than I thought."  
  
He reddened again, and muttered, "I DON'T wanna know . . ."  
  
We parted for a while. After I told Sango, she sneered at me. "Well, who told you to grope the poor boy—girl—whatever— anyways?"  
  
I gave her a boyish grin. "Lady Sango," I said dramatically, putting my hands over my heart, "You know you're the only one I truly love."  
  
She pushed me playfully. "Shove off, Romeo."  
  
I turned to Kagome, who was whispering something to girl-Inuyasha. I smiled. "It appears that Kagome is telling Lady Inuyasha about the monthly periodic breeding."  
  
Sango slapped me on the cheek. My entire face now stung (the one Inuyasha gave me still hadn't faded yet). I rubbed both cheeks. "Ow . . . I meant monthly periodic bleeding."  
  
She yelled at me, "How do you know about that ANYWAYS?!!"  
  
I sighed, leaving with two vivid slap marks on both sides of my face.  
  
So! Whad'ya think? This is my very first Inuyasha fanfic, so . . . don't judge too harshly. Ja!  
  
Review. 


	2. Chapter Two

Story: Inuyasha One Half  
  
Author: Minuiko  
  
Summary: AU. Inuyasha is a regular kid on a class field trip to China. By some twist of fate, he falls into an enchanted spring in Jusenkyo, which turns him into a girl! While he searches for a cure, he makes new friends, enemies, and learns to deal with becoming the opposite gender. Inuyasha/Kagome, Miroku/Sango, etc.  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Sesshoumaru's POV  
  
I watched as Inuyasha's schoolgirl friend (I believe that her name was Kagome) chattered to my little brother—sister— about something. The pervert, whose name was Miroku, got up and walked to the hotel. I smirked. Both sides of his face had red handprints on it.  
  
I remembered the innkeeper telling me the temporary remedy (or side effect, whichever one) for Inuyasha's transformation. It was hot water. I resisted the urge to tell him this, knowing that I would be rewarded with a lot of amusement by not doing so, as I watched him struggle in the girls' body.  
  
Inuyasha got up jerkily, which resulted in several of the boys looking in interest (wide eyes, jaw dropped) at 'her' slim figure. She announced nervously, "I'm going to the restroom."  
  
A couple of people chuckled at this. Most people didn't exactly announce that in public out loud. Before she walked off, I called out, "Remember to use the girls' bathroom, sis!" She glared at me.  
  
A couple of minutes later, a very loud, very shrill scream came out of the bathroom. I stalked up there, massaging my ears. This was probably another one of my brother's unpleasant discoveries. I drawled, "What is it now, Inuyasha?"  
  
She was outside, red-faced, cupping a certain area between her legs. "My . . . my—"  
  
I stared at her, one eyebrow delicately raised. She screamed, "My freakin' balls are gone!!!"  
  
If I hadn't been so stoical, I would have burst out laughing. I advised, "Hush, or you'll cause a scene."  
  
She continued yelling, so I sighed, picked her up by the waist, and dumped her onto Kagome's bed. I shut the door before remarking with a smirk, "Yeah, that happens sometimes, when you turn from a boy to a girl. God, didn't you know?"  
  
She calmed down, still breathing heavily. She snapped, "Of course I did, it just gave me a shock, that's all!"  
  
I rolled my eyes. The idiot. I said, "Well, at least you didn't go into the boys' bathroom."  
  
She glared. I eyed her warily. "Now, are you calm enough to go down into the campsite, or do I have to carry you?"  
  
She aimed a punch at my left cheek, which I took as the second answer. "Be my guest."  
  
I picked Inuyasha up and settled her firmly onto my shoulder again. Kagome had just entered the room while Inuyasha was screeching, "You bastard, if you don't put me down, I'll cut off your family jewels and throw them into a fire, so you can't get them back, and see how you feel—"  
  
My eyes casually wandered over to the schoolgirl, who was staring at Inuyasha, a slow smile starting on her features. Inuyasha turned red. "Shut up!"  
  
I dumped him onto the floor. "Well, if you could've walked, Ms. I- have-no-balls, why didn't you say so?"  
  
Inuyasha snorted, brushing herself off. She stormed down with her nose pointing up. I suppressed a grin and said to Kagome in my traditionally flat tone, "You may want to keep an eye on him."  
  
She smiled. "Isn't that your job . . .?"  
  
I replied in the same bored voice, "Chaperones typically don't protect their charges from hormone-incensed boys whose hands tend to wander."  
  
She gasped. "Damn, you're right! I know a lot of perverts down there . . ."  
  
Her voice faded off as she ran after Inuyasha. I walked to my room, where there was a large window pane that gave me a full view of Inuyasha in the camp site. Strange. We have individual rooms, AND a camp site. Some teachers are just plain dumb. I grinned, opening the window so that I could hear what was happening.  
  
Inuyasha's POV  
  
How dare he! Picking me up like baggage. I rubbed my stomach, still sore from his amazingly sharp shoulder digging into it. Kagome caught up with me, breathless. I looked sideways at her. "What now?"  
  
She said, "Well, people still don't know who you are, so—"  
  
Hojo, the idiot who had liked Kagome for ages and openly showed it, came up to me, winking. "Wow, you're pretty hot. What's your name?"  
  
My eye twitched in annoyance. I said, "Inuyasha, dumbass. No need to introduce yourself . . . Hobo . . ."  
  
He gave an obviously fake (or was it?!) hearty laugh, saying, "Inuyasha. That sounds familiar . . . but no matter! It's beautiful! Hobo? Cute nickname. I like it! D'you wanna go with me on a tour of this place, oh goddess—"  
  
Kagome now wore an expression of mock wistfulness. I gulped. What now? She looked at Hojo with the same sad expression, saying in a dramatic voice, "Well, if you truly love her, Hojo . . . I won't get in your way."  
  
He now looked at her with a teary expression in his eyes. "'I won't get in your way.' Oh, how noble! You, Kagome, are divine. But," he eyes me sadly. "Lady Inuyasha is beautiful too! Oh, how cruel! To love two people so much! It's as if—"  
  
CLANG!  
  
I had been on the verge of screaming bloody murder at the overly dramatic Hojo when Sango knocked him out with a spatula. She waved it in the air. "Borrowed it from one of the cooks. I figured you two needed some help. The dirty two-timer. Speaking of two-timers . . ."  
  
Her eyes trailed over to Miroku, who was holding a random (and disturbed) girl's hand. She stalked towards them, spatula in hand. I looked at Kagome, scowling. "'I won't get in your way?' What am I, your scapegoat?"  
  
She grinned. "Well, it was worth a shot, if it would get Hojo to stop worshipping me. But hey, it didn't work, so that's alright. So . . ." she looked at the unconscious Hojo. "Should we take him somewhere where he won't be trampled?"  
  
I looked down on him with disgust. "Nah, let him get stepped on, he won't mind."  
  
She eyed me with exasperation. "How would you know?"  
  
I stared at her. "The guy thought that 'Hobo' was a complement, so naturally, he'd welcome a couple of people walking over him. Don't worry 'bout it."  
  
She smiled and said, "C'mon. Let's get to dinner."  
  
My stomach rumbled, so I agreed enthusiastically.  
  
Miroku's POV  
  
I don't know WHERE Sango got the spatula, but it really left a mark. I sighed audibly, protesting, "I only asked her to bear my child—"  
  
She glared at me. "And that's nothing to be angry about, two-face?"  
  
Ouch. I smiled. "No, you should be proud that I didn't ask her to bear me CHILDREN—"  
  
She hit my head again with the spatula. I yelped, "Why a spatula?!"  
  
She grinned. "It's metal, and can be used for a variety of things, which includes cooking and hitting perverted two-timers on the head."  
  
I would have complained, but decided against it; instead, I rubbed my aching head. "So. Wanna try lap dancing after dinner?"  
  
She slapped me. I corrected myself quickly, "I meant tap dancing! They're giving out free lessons!"  
  
She snorted. "Your constant slip of innocent words into perverted ideas makes me wonder whether you're doing it on purpose or not . . ."  
  
I said in a sing-song voice, "But you love me for it!"  
  
She laughed. "If that's what you want to believe."  
  
I feigned an injured tone, "Lady Sango . . ."  
  
She rolled her eyes. "Come on, let's go."  
  
That's it . . . sorry for not updating for a long time . . . finals . . .  
  
Review! 


	3. Chapter Three

Story: Inuyasha One Half  
  
Author: Minuiko  
  
Summary: AU. Inuyasha is a regular kid on a class field trip to China. By some twist of fate, he falls into an enchanted spring in Jusenkyo, which turns him into a girl! While he searches for a cure, he makes new friends, enemies, and learns to deal with becoming the opposite gender. Inuyasha/Kagome, Miroku/Sango, etc.  
  
Rating: PG-13

Kouga's POV

I was left behind . . . again! Why didn't the dumb teachers take any notice of me? I even paid for the dumb plane trip! And the idiots just—GRRRRR!!!!

We-ll . . . it wasn't even like I wanted to go to Jusenkyo . . . but Inuyasha was there! And Kagome! I knew that they were best friends, and I couldn't risk them getting any closer . . . she was MINE!

Besides, Inuyasha owed me fifty cents from kindergarten.

I grimaced as I looked around the airport for the sign 'China.' Man, my sense of direction was BAD. I managed to reach a random plane in time (who needs signs anyway?! I'll just ask a flight attendant), and entered it in time. But I wasn't sure where I was going. I asked a stewardess politely (with my traditional, sexy wink), "'scuse me, ma'am, where is this plane headed?"

She muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, "They'll allow any retard to come on the plane these days . . ." and answered sweetly, "Australia, sir. Buckle up, it'll be a long ride."

Wait. Australia?! New lesson for me: never go anywhere if you don't know where you're headed!

I looked out the window wistfully. "That's another years' allowance wasted . . ."

You're paying for this, Inuyasha! Although, it WAS my fault . . .

Miroku's POV

I yawned. There wasn't a lot to do around here. Occasionally I would attempt to grope some girl's ass, but all that resulted in was more bruises (hey! A spatula really hurt!).

I looked at Inuyasha exclaiming, "What do you mean, I need a bra!" and chuckled. Some guys—girls—could be so indiscreet. I yawned again, and wondered if there could be a cure for her condition. I hoped not.

A thought suddenly came to me. I hadn't asked Sango . . . or Inuyasha, for that matter, but that would be just wrong . . . to bear my child yet! I immediately took her hand and said in a sing-song voice, "Sango, will you bear my . . ."

SMACK!

"Don't say it," she huffed, and stalked a short distance away. I smiled. Man, I was desperate, taking so many hits from Sango and still chasing (groping) after her. She had accepted me, somewhat; she never yelled at me, or told me not to do it again, so I assumed that she secretly enjoyed the attention I was giving her.

I whistled as I found a pretty Chinese girl working in the hotel. Man, look at those curves! But before I could take her hand and ask her my traditional, I sensed danger. I gulped, looking behind me. Sango . . . she had a scary, very scary look on her face. I grinned boyishly and slung my arm around her shoulders. Let's take this slowly . . .

"If you want a girl so badly, get yourself one. Don't go around torturing all these innocents." Her voice was flat, and her face was still scary . . . not a good sign.

I didn't tell her that the one girl I really wanted to 'get' was her . . . I grinned again, changing the subject. "Wanna mate?"

She hit me with the spatula, again. I corrected, "I meant date! Wanna date?"

She snorted. "You perverted bastard. Maybe, maybe not. We'll see how you behave this week."

I heard her murmur with a scathing voice, "He IS doing it on purpose!" and shook my head. No, I wasn't! I just happened to use those terms, well, rather a lot.

I sighed, and walked over to see what Inuyasha was doing.

Inuyasha, who happened to have weird, built-in magenta eye-shadow, seemed genuinely glad to see me. "Come here, Miroku! Tell this wench," she jerked her head to Kagome, "that I DO NOT need A BRA!! How degrading! It's bad enough," she grimaced, "that I have to borrow her school uniform. I am NOT wearing one of Ms. I'm-so-cheerful-I'm-gonna-puke's bras!"

I smiled. "Well, it looks better with one. You don't want it to sag later in life, do you?" Well, it was true! That was what I had heard Sango's mother telling her— on accident, of course.

"Gah—you moronic pervert. I'm NOT staying a girl my entire life! I'll find a cure soon . . ."

Kagome chirped, "But for the mean time, you'll need one. You don't want all the boys drooling after you, do you?"

I pretended to check Inuyasha out, which wasn't hard, because she WAS hot, and that offended her more than anything else. "Fine! I'll wear that—chest reign . . ."

I gave a crooked grin and walked off.

Inuyasha's POV

Damn it! Miroku didn't help, at all. Maybe I should ask my oh-so-wonderfully dull and expressionless older brother if he knew a cure . . . No! I'm not that desperate . . . yet . . . But it's only a matter of time before I am . . . I mean, losing my manhood was bad enough . . . I have to wear one of those chest-binding things too?

"Inuyasha, what color would you prefer? I've got red, white, pink . . ."

I glared furtively at her and said, "Red, although I'd prefer if I didn't have to wear one."

She handed me a scarlet bra, and I went into the bathroom to change. A few minutes passes by.

"Kagome, how do you put these freakin' things on?!"

Sesshoumaru's POV

I lay on the bed, my fur-lined pillow beneath me. Even from up here, I could hear my idiotic younger brother screaming about some bra he couldn't put on. Talk about being loud.

I mused to myself; how long would it be before Inuyasha found out that hot water could, until he encountered cold water, cure him? Maybe a few days. Needless to say, he wasn't the most hygienic guy around.

I toyed with my fluffy pillow for a few more minutes before thinking, 'I really need a life.'

Deciding that there was nothing better to do, I called up my secretary, Kagura Kazejin, who was supervising one of the kids. I think her name was Kanna. I wouldn't believe it if I hadn't seen her birth certificate, but the half-dead, three-foot-tall little imp was actually Inuyasha's age.

". . . Sesshoumaru? This had better be good . . ."

"Actually, it's not. What are you doing?"

It was more of a flat demand than a question, but I could care less. She paused, before answering, "Sleeping, but if you're bored, I could come over. Yes, I know where you are."

"What do you mean?"

She was shrugging, I could tell. She answered, "I didn't mean it as it sounded. I don't think you're the type to be seduced. Maybe we could watch the new movie that Kanna bought or something."

She's right. I had never been seduced before, and never would be. I told her monotonously, "Alright."

She hung up.

Kouga's POV

I was finally going to Jusenkyo! Yes, I used up another years' allowance, but it was worth it . . . right?! I was finally going to right the wrongs Inuyasha owed me, and get back my fifty cents . . .

A/N The reason I put in the Sesshoumaru/Kagura part . . . because I felt like it! I'm sosososo sorry for not updating, I was really lazy (and I was creating new stories in Makai Tenshi).

I don't think Sesshoumaru's Sesshoumaru-y enough . . . he's too bored, too nice, too . . . blegh. I so envy TailFluffGirl for her ability to capture their personalities like that . . .

Next chapter: Inuyasha gets caught in the showers, we finally meet Kouga, the directionless loser, and Miroku's sneaking around Sesshoumaru's rooms? Geez!

Well, since I actually updated, can you review?!


	4. Chapter Four

**Inuyasha One Half**

By: _Minuiko_

Yes, after so long, I finally decide to update. :3

----

Chapter Four

_----_

_Inuyasha's POV_

"Inuyasha, it's been three days since you've last showered, you think you can manage it today?"

"Yeah, yeah, Ka-go-me…" I replied, putting extra emphasis on her name just to be annoying. She growled, then threw a bra at me, yelling, "Sorry, Inuyasha, you'll need one of these too!!"

_Girls_. I snatched it, and hid it carefully in my, well, _her_, clothes that I was borrowing, so that people wouldn't see it… of course, it wouldn't matter if they _had_, but… I shrugged. I guessed I really did need a shower. I probably smelled like shit… although technically, three days wasn't a lot.

I turned on the water, cursing the bad technology of this stinking place. I felt the water. Growled with frustration. Waited a few seconds. Felt the water again. Stepped back and waited some more. Felt it one last time. "WHY THE HELL IS IT SO COLD?!!"

"You have to change the temperature."

A girl I didn't know pointed to some sort of thermometer where you could change the temperature at the corner of the shower. She looked like one of Kagome's friends… Yuka, I think. I flushed. "Um… er, thanks…"

I changed the water to hot. And climbed in the now-warm shower…

…

…

I poked myself. Hard. In the chest. It was flat! IT WAS FLAT!!! I looked down at the place where I was previously lacking substance. Oh, thank god! THANK GOD!!! "Hallelujah, I'm a guy again!!!"

That was not the smartest thing to do. At least fifty other faces turned to me. And stared at my body, wide-eyed in horror.

…

…

"AAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!! THERE'S A PERVERT IN THE BATHROOM!!!!!!"

Life sickened me. The last thing I saw was the face of a very red-faced, very nude, and very pissed off girl in front of me, claws outstretched. And behind her was a crowd of other girls with evil, gleaming eyes and veins popping on their foreheads. "AAAHHH!!!"

_Miroku's POV_

There were groaning sounds… they were coming… from Inuyasha's brother's apartment. Now, being how I was, I couldn't just walk away, not could I? They were getting more prominent…

I was next to the door… I could hear the sounds. "Come here, Fluffy, and help me with this!!"

It was a woman. Fluffy? How interesting. How very interesting. Help her with what? I heard Sesshoumaru answer, "Don't call me that."

Then the next voice was unmistakably Inuyasha's. "No!" He was groaning every other word or so. "Don't—ugh—let… that… Uunngh!... don't come any closer… NO! Don't touch there! It's friggin' sensitive!"

Ooh. A threesome? Those moaning sounds sure were… revealing. I never knew that Sesshoumaru was into incest. On second thought… maybe… they were raping him! No, Inuyasha! You mustn't succumb to their tactics! I chose to open the door at that moment…

To find Kanna's sister bandaging an extremely beaten up and bruised Inuyasha with a frown at Sesshoumaru, who was sitting on the bed looking innocent and perfectly bored to death. Then Inuyasha screamed again. "YOU BASTARD!! You did that on purpose!! You _knew_ that that bruise hurt the most!!! _Teme_!!"

He threw a punch as best as he could with only one arm. Sesshoumaru easily caught it and looked at me. "What can we do for you?"

"Eh heh… nothing… actually, maybe… the lady here could accompany me on a walk, perhaps?"

I gestured towards the oh-so-lovely lady Kagura with a dumb grin on my face. Inuyasha groaned again and screamed, "PERVERTED ASSHOLE!! I know you! You'll want something more than a walk!! And—"

"Hey, you're a guy again?"

Sesshoumaru interrupted Inuyasha, who was about to answer. "Yes. Hot water turns him into a guy, while cold water turns him into a girl. The innkeeper told us— well, me, anyways. Needless to say, he got caught in the girls' shower."

"YES, AND THAT SON OF A BITCH SITTING NEXT TO ME— not you, Kagura, the other son of a bitch— wait, you're a girl, so cross that—HE FREAKIN' KNEW!!! HE _KNEW_!! DAMN YOU SESSHOUMARU! WHY DON"T YOU JUST GO TO—"

"As fun as that sounds, brother slash sister dear, I'm afraid I'm busy. I'll go to hell some other time, ne?"

"SO IT'S BROTHER SLASH SISTER NOW, EH?!! I AM NOT A HERMAPHRODITE!! YOU LITTLE—"

Kagura restrained him. "Inuyasha. Don't move, I need to finish bandaging you."

I took that opportunity to walk slowly away from the room.

_Kouga's POV_

I DID IT!! I made it to Jusenkyo… I was crying tears of bitterness. Tears of happiness. And tears of love!! Oh, Kagome, your rescuer has arrived! I won't let you go with that stupid mutt, Inuyasha!!

I asked this guy who was passing by for directions. "Jusenkyo? Do you know where Jusenkyo is?"

"Ye mean the springs? Ye damn fool, why would you want to go there?"

"WHERE IS JUSENKYO?!!"

Feebly, he pointed in a direction. I started walking. "IDIOT, I POINTED _THERE_, NOT THERE!"

----

A/N Hehe. I think I'll stop here… short, I know, but… (shrugs) I realize that they haven't met Kouga yet, but... oh well. You want spoilers? Ok. Kaede is Cologne, Kikyou is Shampoo, and Suikotsu is Mousse. I've already got Tsubasa and Ukyo down (no, Sango is not Ukyo… I just thought it would be fun to give her a spatula ), and they're coming, so don't worry! This is loosely based on the Ranma series; it's mostly my creation… with some parody here and there from Ranma. xD

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